The life is bleeding out of me again
the pain doubles me over
snatches my breath
and I clutch and clasp my abdomen.
I am not comforted.
My body shakes from the unrelenting waves of pain
I can't even curl up into a fetal position.
Hormonal imbalances
fibroid tumors
endometriosis
bloody fluxes
issues of blood
hemmorhages
hypermenorrhea
The life is bleeding out of me again.
The woman in the gospel on suffered for twelve years.
I have been bleeding for thirty years.
Her living Christ had a body, an accessible body
clothed in garments of prayer for her to touch, grasp, cling to.
My resurrected Christ is long gone from this earth
leaving no talisman behind
no certain healing touch
if I can just press my way
only the vagaries and unpredictabilities of modern medicine and prayer.
Unanticipated respite
days, weeks, years - five this last time
moments of grace until they are washed away
in another bloody flux.
No comments:
Post a Comment